Today, after preschool and play group, I loaded up my boys and an entire Jeep worth of Nathan's stuff and drove 90 miles to meet my parents. About a month before Zachary was born Nathan expressed a desire to spend the weekend at his grandparents (without his parents). We started to refer to this as Nathan's Big Boy trip. A few days ago, after struggling with Nathan all day, I decided to call the grandparents and make the Big Boy trip happen. Nathan has been super excited and so have I. Theoretically, Zach and I could stay in bed all day tomorrow.
Funny thing is, as we are driving to the DQ (halfway to Tulsa) this evening my heart starts to race. I start thinking about all the little things that Nathan likes to have at bedtime and worrying about how little sleep he actually gets at his grandparent's house. I start to worry about him getting bored, sick, or sad. I worry about him waking in the middle of the night wanting his mommy and me not being there to hold him. I worry about how his grandparents will discipline him if he is naughty. I worry that he feels like he has been shipped off so mommy and daddy can spend extra time with Zach.
After we met my parents, transferred almost too much stuff to fit in my mom's car, and kissed goodbye, I found 4 reasons to call my mom before I got back home. I fought the urge to write a little letter explaining the details of Nathan's current behavior and day to day activities. Even sitting here typing this blog I keep thinking of things I should have told my mom, but at some point I have to let go. I have to be grateful that Nathan has grandparents who are close enough and willing to spend time with him. I have to realize that this is an opportunity for Nate to enjoy lots of individual attention. And most of all I need to enjoy a little break as Mommy. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
So this is me, letting go, and looking forward to a little extra freedom for the next 3 days. I'm sure Nathan will be the first and last thing on my mind every day that he is gone.
4 comments:
I'm sure you, and I, will feel this way the first time and the 100th time we "let go". But deep down we know that our kids are ready and will be better, and us, after a break. If you get board, give us a call. You can hear how hectic it is in my house, smile, then hang-up and enjoy the rest of your day!
I still do this and Avery is 8 (& we lived with my parents for two years!!) My mom usually stops me after one sentence & says, I'll call you if I need to, we'll be fine. And it always is! Enjoy your time honey!
Just so you know, I adore you. As much as I so need a vacation I don't know if I could actually leave my little ones given the opportunity. He will love it grandma will love it and baby gets all of Mommy's attention, if ony for a few days.
I hope he--and you guys--had a great time! Jack thinks he is ready to spend a couple of nights at Grandma and Grandpa's without us, so I think we are going to do it next week. I am not sure if I will know what to do with all that free time...but I'm sure I'll figure it out quickly! : )
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